Moldova Sucks!!!!

To get the title reference go see RED.

RED stands for Retired and Extremely Dangerous. Which nicely sums up Frank Moses played by Bruce Willis. Though when we first meet Frank, he is this old man in a wife-beater t-shirt waking up at 6am and sloshing down ten pills. The highlight of his day comes when he calls his retirement case officer to talk about his retirement check not arriving, a woman named Sarah Ross trapped in cubicle hell who dreams of visiting Chile and Frank's answer to when he was there was "It was dark." Franks thinks there is a chance of romance with Sarah so he finds himself reading the same bodice ripping romance novels she is reading.

Then one morning at 3:32am Frank has to come out of retirement when a six man assassination squad literally shoot his house apart. Needless to say Frank makes it out alive and sets out to find out who is trying to kill him. Along the way he kidnaps Sarah to save her and proceeds to collect his old comrades - Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, and Helen Mirren. By the time these retired pros are done ferreting out the truth, many bullets have been fired with many explosions and justice amply served.

It was real nice to see Ernest Borgnine get a nice cameo role as the chief librarian of the CIA's secret files. And fitting since Borgnine had played a Soviet spy in the classic spy movie Ice Station Zebra. Helen Mirren as Victoria was smashing, a genteel lady who packs an MP-5SD in a bouquet of yellow roses. It was a fun movie.